Life Is… – The Real Secrets to Help You Win in Life

Life Is… – The Real Secrets to Help You Win in Life

Life is…

Winning is defined so often as who crossed the finish line.   It is often associated with public competition and walking away with the medal.  I challenge you to think about winning from within and project outward the true essence of winning… isn’t that what life is for so many?

Feeling accomplished, feeling passionate, striving for the next accomplishment whether it be big or small, learn something new, make someone smile, feeling healthy, growing inside, or just making a difference!  These are all aspects of winning. Drawing from within is a great way to identify with what makes you a winner.  The person inside is who we really are and as such is our inner strength or inner peace.

Life is something that requires reflection.  I find that by reflecting on what I have accomplished, how I feel and who I may have impacted is the way I see if I am winning.

I define myself as a winner in life.  Like most, I have made mistakes, however reflecting on those mistakes and gleaming from them what I can enables me to grow and be the winner I am.

Pride is important aspect of life.  Pride can sometimes get in the way, so it is important to keep the balance of all areas contributing to your winning essence.  It is this essence that grows inside and requires nurturing and care to ensure there is adequate sustenance.  This may sound odd, however there is truth to the adages ‘you need to like yourself before someone else will like you.’ This means we need to be comfortable with ourselves before we can expect others to be comfortable with us.  There is no need to be arrogant or egotistical.

You know when you meet real winners, they do not act superior and are level headed and confident in their space.  As for me, I am confident and sometimes that confidence may intimidate others. I try to be conscious of this so people are not walking away with the wrong impression.  I am not saying to worry about what others think, however we all should pay attention to how we make others feel.

I also try and lift others in a variety of ways.  I send inspirational messages, forward those that have inspired me, have a uplifting conversation or simply pay a compliment to someone who appears to be struggling.

Negativity can be consuming and an easy path to fall into.  Sometimes when I feel like I may be stuck in a rut, I try and define what it is that makes me feel stuck.  It could be something big or small – either way it is not making me feel good.  So now it comes to a choice – make a change for the better, face it head on and work with it, or walk away to gain perspective.

I see folks sometimes fall into the trap of allowing negativity to consume and monopolize the situation.  If I feel someone is constantly negative with no other redeeming qualities – I will remove the toxic source.  Now it may not be possible to totally remove a toxic person from your life for a variety of circumstances. In this instance, that person is just removed from those areas of my life that are important to me, that I draw my strength from, that I rely on to win.

I believe if you are able to draw from within, reflect on your life, be good to yourself and grow as an individual- you have all the secrets you need to win!

Let’s break it down – essential elements of life are…

Health – there is physical & mental health.  Many times, we focus on the physical which is very important however neglecting the mental side of your health is equally important. Some form of physical activity that challenges you is key to improving your physical health.

A time of meditation or a time of decompression is key to improving your mental health. Both of these work together to create a strong, well-balanced and healthy body. Personally, I find that doing cardio at the gym helps to improve my mental state as well as challenging my body physically.

Life Balance – What is balance really? It rarely equals 50/50 of anything, it is what works for you and those that you care about.  For me, my husband does much of the house and family tasks however I still am a key player in everything.  He is there and ensures my children are safe, learning new things, and growing as an individual while developing their inner strength.  I admire him for this in my life as it gives me a balance in my own growth.  Now I am very conscious of my husband’s growth as well and ensure he is enabled to grow in the areas important to him. 

Balance may sometimes be confused with teamwork, while often an important element, not truly the definition.  Finding balance brings a feeling of satisfaction into life, satisfaction with how things are working, satisfaction with contributions and a satisfaction with outcomes even if they are temporary.  My husband, my family and I do bring me balance and I would say the balance shifts depending upon what is going on which is okay for our family.

Self Reflection – There are times where emotions play a big part and somethings takes things to an unintended level.  However, being able to reflect and learn from the experience is such a rich opportunity for anyone.  To be able to think and reflect (but not dwell) on something –– just learn from it and see what, if given the chance again, you would do differently.  These are gold nuggets in life’s learnings. The ability to reflect on something, learn from it and see what you could do different in the future is a true gold nugget in life and learning.

I have a strong love of life.  At times I do get frustrated however when I step back and reflect I find things may look and feel different.  There are things that get me faster than others however knowing that this is my weakness I am stronger as I am prepared for the next time.  I cannot say everything will always be roses however if everyone were to apply some aspect of reflection – think of the possibilities!

Inner Peace – Are you okay with YOU?  What do you see when you look in the mirror?  I have seen many shadows of myself over the years.  It wasn’t until I was able to look within that I realized my challenge with with myself and not others.  I was the one who needed to be the master of my own destiny and be in a good place mentally to achieve this.  I started a daily routine of reflection at the beginning of the day to understand where I am and then again at the end of the day to see where I landed on the day. 

Admittedly sometimes it was a great feeling of accomplishment and others a sense of defeat.  Did it ever get the better of me – absolutely as I am human, however once I am able to collect myself and truly reflect I am able to identify the diamonds to learn from… allowing me to grow and to be at peace with myself.  With inner peace and acceptance, you will be able to take on each new day as it comes and tackle it like none other!

Express Yourself – Are your emotions in check?  Don’t feel like they always have to be as ability to show and share emotion is critical in your awareness journey.  Expressing your opinions with passion and strength may intimidate others, be aware however it isn’t always necessary to adjust.  Read the situation and adjust if you must otherwise take charge with confidence but don’t be a jerk about it. 

It is important to understand your surroundings, what is acceptable for the current situation and how will you take this and apply to your learnings.  Sometimes your expression may only be understanding, listening and comforting.  Sometimes expression that is without words can be the most powerful of any!


Growth – How are you growing yourself?  What do you do to nurture growth in your life?  Growth is a very interesting term.  There are things that you were born with that are fixed and there are things that come from hard work and repetition.  I am not sure of a skill or talent I was born with other than stubbornness, however I have worked very hard to learn as much as I can about many things. 

do not give up easily, I may walk away to return on another day.  I persevere through persistence…. Along with a winning attitude that I can accomplish anything I set my mind to, which is the secret to winning!


Legacy – what will you be remembered for?  I pride myself on my professional career however who really will remember that over time… More important to me is my family and friends with their memories and experiences with me and of me in my lifetime.  It is important for me to be there for my family and friends when they need it and see who is there for me when I am in need. I want my legacy to be positivity for my family, to know there is nothing that they cannot overcome, to feel love and be loved.


Love of Life – having a zest to live is essential to positivity!  Life is what you make it, defining each moment and moving forward, reflecting often, learning lots and loving where you are and who you are. 

We are not always dealt with easy paths and that is important to learning and growing.  My mother still tells me today that God will never give me more than I can handle.  And I will admit I do tell her sometimes He has more faith in me than I have in myself.  As soon as those words leave my mouth I begin to reflect and realize I am strong enough! 

Everyone has moments of doubt, moments they feel they cannot go on and seek a change.  I would challenge you to think about what it is that is making you feel that way and change it!  Seek the positivity… seek the support because it is there if you look… seek the reward…. Know the secret of winning!


We should never allow another person, an experience, or whatever you face to dim what lives inside of us.  We should however find ways to express and magnify all the good and positivity that is already there. We are all pillars of strength, each in our own unique way and as such have the potential to win everyday!  Live, love, laugh is a repeated saying for a reason – it makes sense!

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